So, What is to be happy? What will make you happy? What is happiness after all?

Before this question, lets see who is happy?
Humm.. Well, Poor people say we dont have money, if we get we will be happy. Similarly, rich people say we are not happy becuase we dont have love in family. People who are unmarried are always looking out for their better halves, on the contrary people who are married are not happy with their marriages. Some people say, happiness lies in nurturing small small pleasures in life, but what if you dont have ur basics in place (roti/kapada/makan)?

After long thoughts and experiences, here are some things which i can share with you.

* Money doesnt buy happiness. That doesnt mean, dont work and earn money, it should be the path to attain happiness and not the goal.
* Friends and Family doesnt buy happiness either. That ofcourse, doesnt mean, that dont be social or dont get married, it means that reduce your expectations from them, that they will make you happy always n consistently.
* “You are being watched always” by God. Remember this and you will not commit any mistakes which will bother you in long run.
* Spiritual maturity is necessary – any religion
* Happiness is in giving and not taking.
* Do everything for what you are responsible for in personal as well as professional life.
* Forgive & be patient.

Well ofcourse, i dont say these are the only things which will attain happiness. Just food for thought.

Life is not a piece of cake, as we all know. As there are happy moments, there are bad moments too. Everybody enjoys happy moments. The problem is when bad phase hits our door, expected or unexpectedly. It hurts, we feel like crying and we feel so sad and depressed and angry. Its out of our control to manage this sadness and we feel helpless & worthless (sometimes). Attitude of revenge and hatred lingers in some cases. Many a times, our families are with us to console but still its difficult to find peace in it and we continue to suffer in our own shell. We suffer for months together and we see that we are suffering since years now. And you realise when you start seeing physical repercussions because of that.
Why we are unable to get over a bad phase in life. Why we are not letting it go? Is it worth it, breaking your head and health? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we would have got over it, a lit’ sooner? How?

Its important to give appropriate importance to that sad moment. Its well and fine that you have cried, are sad. Why continue it for too long? Why give reasons to yourself saying you cant help it and not come out the shell. On the contrary, no one but you yourself can help yourself. You got to be a lit’ selfish here. To get over it you need to make consious effort to think different.

What if you think, You are making yourself suffer for some person who might be sleeping in peace at that time.

What if you think, OK i will leave it God! I forgive him/her for all the pains and sufferings i have gone through, because oh Almighty God you have forgiven me so many times and embraced me with love when i literally don’t deserve it. Its your attitude and moral values which comes to your rescue.

What if you think, There are so many unfortunate people around, life is so unstable anyways, why i make this sad moment of my life a big thing? Why not focus on something different and creative?

When will you be able to think like that? When you are well aware of whats going on in the world and gain spiritual maturity. I believe, it all depends on your thinking. A little change in thinking, would ease your ways to tackle such situations. If you do not handle your sad moments correctly, you obviously tend to get more of them and you will fill yourself with all the negatives, hatred and depressing thoughts, which will not let you live peacefully either.

Most of the times, your own people tend to make you suffer a lot, which kills you if you don’t have the right attitude. Right attitude is to assume that no person in this world is bad and accept as he or she is.

Forgiveness, tolerance, patience and power to let go are your assets while dealing with closed ones. No two individuals are same. They have different thought process, different views, different backgrounds and different attitudes. The challenge is to able to deal with everyone with compassion and grace for that matter even with your enemies. One should be quick to forgive and embrace, is a lesson to learn.

To conclude, its important to get out of bad phase “so called SHELL” at any cost or you will loose your life. I have seen lot of beautiful lives into depression.
This is small piece out of some of my experiences which might help some one who is in need…