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Don’t let a bad phase ruin your life.. Life is precious.

After seeing life and facing lot of ups and downs till now, i feel that life is simply an examination to be cleared. You are either a “failure” or “success” in life at the end. Success not only in terms of your status, education, money, position but also in terms of you strongly coming out of your bad phases, dealing nitty gritty things with grace, your fighting spirit, your genuine relations maintained, memories, your impressions, your values & faith, your teachings and your nature.

Life is not a piece of cake, as we all know. As there are happy moments, there are bad moments too. Everybody enjoys happy moments. The problem is when bad phase hits our door, expected or unexpectedly. It hurts, we feel like crying and we feel so sad and depressed and angry. Its out of our control to manage this sadness and we feel helpless & worthless (sometimes). Attitude of revenge and hatred lingers in some cases. Many a times, our families are with us to console but still its difficult to find peace in it and we continue to suffer in our own shell. We suffer for months together and we see that we are suffering since years now. And you realise when you start seeing physical repercussions because of that.
Why we are unable to get over a bad phase in life. Why we are not letting it go? Is it worth it, breaking your head and health? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we would have got over it, a lit’ sooner? How?

Its important to give appropriate importance to that sad moment. Its well and fine that you have cried, are sad. Why continue it for too long? Why give reasons to yourself saying you cant help it and not come out the shell. On the contrary, no one but you yourself can help yourself. You got to be a lit’ selfish here. To get over it you need to make consious effort to think different.

What if you think, You are making yourself suffer for some person who might be sleeping in peace at that time.

What if you think, OK i will leave it God! I forgive him/her for all the pains and sufferings i have gone through, because oh Almighty God you have forgiven me so many times and embraced me with love when i literally don’t deserve it. Its your attitude and moral values which comes to your rescue.

What if you think, There are so many unfortunate people around, life is so unstable anyways, why i make this sad moment of my life a big thing? Why not focus on something different and creative?

When will you be able to think like that? When you are well aware of whats going on in the world and gain spiritual maturity. I believe, it all depends on your thinking. A little change in thinking, would ease your ways to tackle such situations. If you do not handle your sad moments correctly, you obviously tend to get more of them and you will fill yourself with all the negatives, hatred and depressing thoughts, which will not let you live peacefully either.

Most of the times, your own people tend to make you suffer a lot, which kills you if you don’t have the right attitude. Right attitude is to assume that no person in this world is bad and accept as he or she is.

Forgiveness, tolerance, patience and power to let go are your assets while dealing with closed ones. No two individuals are same. They have different thought process, different views, different backgrounds and different attitudes. The challenge is to able to deal with everyone with compassion and grace for that matter even with your enemies. One should be quick to forgive and embrace, is a lesson to learn.

To conclude, its important to get out of bad phase “so called SHELL” at any cost or you will loose your life. I have seen lot of beautiful lives into depression.
This is small piece out of some of my experiences which might help some one who is in need…

House hunt in Pune West

Spent a day searching around NH4 Pune bypass. “Open sourcing” my observations & research so far.

Looking for – 2BHK
Budget – 50-60L
Area Preference – Pune West

Baner Pashan Link road
There is construction going on for a road between Paranjpe Rolling Hills and Kumar Shantiniketan. This is supposed to be the actual baner pashan link road, as opposed to the existing narrow road. This was proposed years ago, but work has started just now. Saw a good but already completed project right in front of this road called Paranjape Crystal Garden. I asked an agent to look for a 2bhk in that society.

Balewadi
1. Kunal Aspiree: 2BHK goes till 80L. in front of 60ft dp road. another 100ft dp road goes by. I just saw in DP plan, area near aspiree is reserved for public housing/housing for dishoused. Although builder is well reputed, I would not prefer living in such area.

2. Paritosh: 2bhk 963sqft costs 63.7L and 1024sqft costs 67.5L. Exact location would be Paritosh Site.
Entrance of this society will be on north side and on 100ft dp road. Possession is on Dec 2015. This DP road would eventually connect to highway on one side and Aundh on other side. Looks interesting.
Project website : http://www.sharadaalliance.com/paritosh/index.html

3. Sai Ishanya: Project is almost complete. Possession in Mar 2014. It’s placed just before aspiree, on the other side of 60ft road.Pricing wise, 1059sqft 2bhk costs almost 70L and 1200sqft costs 79.5L. sales person was not there, so couldn’t get more information.

Chinchwad – I was interested in 3 projects sukhwani pacific, queens town and empire estate. Although it has all infrastructure, Chinchwad in general looks old. I also saw many slums on my way to Sukhwani Pacific. Did not like any projects.

1. Sukhwani Pacific: This is right in front of Kumar Birla hospital and adjacent to Orritel hotel. Builder has permission for only 1 more building and permission for other 2 buildings is awaited. What this means is, construction work will go on for more than 5 yrs. Hence not suitable for early residents.

2. Queens town: This is near Chichwad railway station. It is already 1.5 yr old. Although internal environment is pleasant, surrounding area did not look good.

3. Empire Estate: It is right on old Pune Mumbai highway. But looks too old and there is a flyover being constructed passing right through the society. Looks weird and would cause lot of noise, dust & pollution for residents. Can’t imagine living there.

Pimple Saudagar – Area is well developed. But look like concrete jungle. It connects to Rahatani road which is very wide. Did not see any under construction project except for ‘one nation’, but it’s isolated and near a small slum, so did not inquire.

Pimple Nilakh – Area looks decent and has come up well. The main road seems bit narrow. This same road is supposed to connect Baner. There is a river flowing between baner & this area. PMC has already built the bridge. But PCMC hasn’t yet built a proper road going towards the bridge. So right now the barricades are put on the bridge and no vehicle can go through.

1. Neko SkyPark: 1085sqft 2bhk costs 70L. It’s right on main road of Pimple Nilakh. Shops are nearby. Buildings A,B,C complete and sold out. D & E are open for booking. D completes in March 2014. E completes Dec 2014. Salesman said Service tax & VAT are waived till next Sunday. Rate was negotiable.

Mohan nagar(area near rohan leher): Area is not yet developed. It will take another year or two to become habitable. No lights on road. Would not go there after 7pm.
1. Atul Western Hills: Rate 4950 rs/sqft. 1024sqft 2bhk costs 61L. However 2bhk are sold-out. 1297sqft 2.5 BHK costs 75.57L. Possession is Dec 2016.

Buying Car in India

Buying a new car itself is exciting. It would be more exciting if you do proper research and comparisons.
Here are some points you should consider, apart from the usual factors.

Comfort
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Thigh support plays an important role in comfort. To test this, sit in 2nd row of car in upright position with your back touching the seat.
In this position see how much portion of your thigh is hanging over the edge of the seat. In other words your knees should come as close to the edge of seat, as possible.
Ideal position will be no portion of your thigh remains overhanging or kness touch the edge of the seat from inside.
This dramatically improves the comfort in long journeys.
Also ensure all seats have proper legroom i.e. the person in seat should be able to completely stretch his legs. This again is important in long journeys.

Safety
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Most people in India think about airbags when it comes to safety. However the most important protection you’ll have in case of accident is, seat belt. Every car now comes with seat-belts, but the thing to look for is 3 point seat-belts. Normally upper joint of the seat-belt is fixed. In 3 point system, the upper joint can be moved vertically in 3 different positions, in order to adjust people of different heights.
Another thing is the distance between front most bumper of the car and the driver seat. In case of medium intensity head-on collision, the impact is reduced to some extent till it reaches the driver. So if this distance is larger, chances of injury to the driver are reduced.
Look for ABS & EBD features in car. ABS comes into picture when applying sudden brakes. It prevents skidding of vehicle by applying and releasing the brakes multiple times within fraction of second. EBD works in conjunction with ABS to provide optimal braking force and driving stability.
Another feature to look for is ESC(Electronic Stability Control). It basically detects and reduces loss of control. However this is not yet common in Indian vehicles.

Wheels
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Go for company branded alloy wheels whenever possible. They are indeed costly than usual steel wheels, but are much more sturdy. With usual disc wheels, you often have to do wheel
alignment which are not really cheap. With alloy wheels, you’ll rarely need to do wheel alignment. Other than that, most people find alloy wheels much more attractive. Especially in India where roads many times have have potholes, it makes a better choice.

Reputation
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An established model improved over the years through constant feature upgrades, is definitely more safe choice than to adapt a completely new model. Reason being, flaws in older editions are identified and ironed out by engineers. In completely newer models however, engineers are not fully aware of all the flaws since it’s on road for a really short time and you might end up being Ginnie pig for them. It’s like taking a bet, you can still take chances based on reputation of the company.

Finance
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With recent LBT rule, old octroi system is abolished. LBT varies from place to place. In metro cities it’s much higher e.g. 3.5%, whereas in villages it’s marginal e.g. 0.3%
So if you happen to live in rural area or have some sort of address proof of that area, you could save close to 3% on Ex Showroom price. You’ll have to do RTO registration in that area to get this benefit. If you have moved to city, but your parents are still in rural area, you might consider buying car in their name to save this amount.
If you are buying a luxury car or SUV, you’ll see big savings. e.g. for cars above 10L the difference in LBT is as much as 50,000.

Maintenance Contract
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Look whether company offers Annual Maintenance Contracts or sometimes called AMC. These contracts charge one time fee, for a specific period of time or kilometers. Once you pay one time fee, all the servicing of the vehicle are completely and unconditionally free, for those many years or kilometers. Check with them, that it also covers oil change charges. In most cases these AMCs will save you money just on oil change costs.

Learning Experiences…

Life must have touched each one of us in many different ways. We cry, laugh, are sad , are happy, are angry … and the list continues. At the end of it, everyone of us wants to be happy.

So, What is to be happy? What will make you happy? What is happiness after all?

Before this question, lets see who is happy?
Humm.. Well, Poor people say we dont have money, if we get we will be happy. Similarly, rich people say we are not happy becuase we dont have love in family. People who are unmarried are always looking out for their better halves, on the contrary people who are married are not happy with their marriages. Some people say, happiness lies in nurturing small small pleasures in life, but what if you dont have ur basics in place (roti/kapada/makan)?

After long thoughts and experiences, here are some things which i can share with you.

* Money doesnt buy happiness. That doesnt mean, dont work and earn money, it should be the path to attain happiness and not the goal.
* Friends and Family doesnt buy happiness either. That ofcourse, doesnt mean, that dont be social or dont get married, it means that reduce your expectations from them, that they will make you happy always n consistently.
* “You are being watched always” by God. Remember this and you will not commit any mistakes which will bother you in long run.
* Spiritual maturity is necessary – any religion
* Happiness is in giving and not taking.
* Do everything for what you are responsible for in personal as well as professional life.
* Forgive & be patient.

Well ofcourse, i dont say these are the only things which will attain happiness. Just food for thought.

Realisations…

TRADITIONS

Recently i have realised the importance of traditions which are followed from long years. Now i know, people are not foolish to follow them. Well, by the word “tradition”, i not only mean, the religious rituals, but also different roles played by an individual (i.e. daughter, son, brother, sister, wife, husband, friend, etc. etc). Responsibilites of every role is defined in our great holy scriptures & are part of our traditions. Do we know them? Even if we know them, do we follow them? We only come to know when we really think hard, self introspect and have a desire to find out what is right & correct too.

Its obvious, if we follow traditions, we are least expected of failures, because its well tested by thousand of people. There is a damn good reason of every tradition , for every pattern, i feel.

Its a mere “trend” to do different things without any fear factor, which in most of the cases causes lot of chaos emotionally, physically and mentally. Y not do same things, with a difference?

STUBBORNNESS

This quality deters you from giving right importance to right thing at right time. You are not flexible enough to understand the need of the moment and are into your own rigid thinking, which leads nowhere. We fail to see things which we should have due to our stubbornness. If got rid of this kinda behaviour , its in your self interest.

POWER OF PRAYERS

Can you control how other person behaves with you? You can only hope that he or she will behave good to you. But you can decide to be good to others always and forever and deal with the people who behave bad with you in a hope that they will behave good with you some day. I pray for such people who deliberately or not, behave bad with me and to my surprise, it works.

Praying relieves you and you hand over the matter to God.

EXPECTATIONS

Expectations reduces joy of life. Expect less from people. But if some one is expecting from you, don’t fall short in that. Go beyond that persons expectations and see the difference without further expectations, ofcourse! It helps in all relations and acts as a tonic.

Well, there are many lit things which we understand, learn and move ahead. Its not only important to learn new things, talk to new people but also its very important to grow/evolve in as good human being, become more patient, compassionate and kind towards people around us.

Fusion Of Energies

You wish to rain today and it rains!! Itsn’t it a miracle? In ancient times, our great Yogi’s use to do these unnatural miracles, accumulate lot of energy with their mediations and mantras. Some people are doing it even today. I got to hear lot of true stories from some trustworthy resources and then i started getting questions like : if you listen to nature, does nature listen you? Does nature respond to you in such fantastic manner? If thats so, cant we stop Tsunami’s and natural disasters? Why nature is so cruel, because we are cruel towards nature?

I could think of answers to some questions, but still there are some unanswered questions. I certainly believe that there are some energies acting on us. Positive energies & Negative energies. If you can deal with these energies trying to maximize the postive forces and minimize negative ones, i think that is what is called luck/coincidence/miracle may be.

But what is positive energy? How to accumulate it? What to avoid negative forces to act on us? Can a layman do this? Well, its indeed something different, i would say supernatural.

I would also say, energies are accumulated for us every day, from our day to day activities. There are rays which are falling on us and vibrations which acts on us every day. Say for example, you had a fight with boss, you start hating him, you are not happy with things at home, traffic jams, in all these situations, you will irritated and frustrated, your negative energies are increased. Nevertheless, if you meditate, laugh , try maintaining your cool and forgive others and live and let live, your positive energies are increased. Simply to put it in an equation, greater the positive energies you have, easier for you to live life with peace and joy.

As much as moral values help, we also need physical ways to generated positive energy into our body. We can experience the viberations acting on us when we meditate or do rigourous breathing. After a while we are revitalized and feel rejuvinated. Why? We have generated energy for ourself by doing this. This energy is ofcourse positive.

Yeah, its difficult to accumulate positive energies and everybody cannot do that, and thats why everybody are not saints 🙂 But if we just understand and try this simple principle of life, instead of entangling into worldly bits and pieces, we will be able to talk to nature or use that energy for eternal peace and happiness.

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